addiction, alternative, depression, free verse, improvisation, literature, poetry, politics, Uncategorized

Right/Left Alt-Right/Alt-Left

What an idiot I was to equate the old doped up psychedelic left,

Black & White Panthers, John & Yoko, John Sinclair, MC5, Bob Dylan,

With the new synthetic one.

Beyonce & EDM, Mumford & Sons & a bunch of similar sounding shit.

The old left marched, they fought, they demanded

Equality, peace, legalization of all drugs & fucking in the streets.

The alt-left is almost as white as the alt-right but they’ve taken white guilt to the point of flagellation. I took sociology, psychology, & statistics in college. Most kids learn them from memes. Cut away all the important information and leave the slogan. The new left are invariably well-off, white & post on everyone’s behalf, whether they are wanted or not. The political spectrum is a big circle. In the middle of the top is moderate democratic socialism aka Canada. On the bottom centre of the circle is anarchy. No laws, rules or government, everyone agrees. To the left of this is Stalinism. Economically communist. methodologically totalitarianism. To the bottom right of anarchy you have fascism. Capitalist economics with totalitarian government. Thus any system of government can theoretically be totalitarian, other than true democracy and anarchy.

The destruction of books, of knowledge, like the nazi book burnings were controversial because they represent a rejection of intellect over emotion, they represent human experiences & culture. Words from 200 year old novels should not be changed because they offend someone from the 21st century. That is how we lose original works. Censorship is always the first step towards a totalitarian government. Words are neither good nor bad, merely vehicles of interpretation. Just like Pravda, alt-left events want to know what you will be saying so that anything that doesn’t toe the party line gets no voice. The left, my own leaning, is focused on equality in the future, integration of races and anti fascism. The alt-left is run by successful millennials, usually white and mostly uneducated past high school. They cannot distinguish between debate & battle, they are more interested in semantics and sensationalism than serious politics, such as pronouns & safe spaces. Problem is anyone who expresses any slight disagreement gets a dose of social media mob justice. Things like “properly gendered pronouns” have become political talking points while they sign death warrants behind closed doors. Drone strikes & bombs. I found that looking anyone in the eye and shouting ‘hey you!’ is an effective pronoun for almost everybody.

The left fights the right & now alt-right, while the alt left fight among themselves & the old school lefties. Getting offended is now a full time job for most of these people, again usually affluent & white. They act like insulting their former allies is some heroic act but really it just alienates most people with a working knowledge of history & politics. At the core though they are afraid & disgusted by the people they so nobly defend. Prostitutes, drug addicts, the mentally ill. They also tend to be the most crass, non-politically correct but not hateful people. The homeless. Everyone looks the same at rock bottom. Even though the hipster alt-left they take pills, snort coke & methylate it by mixing it with liquor they still think they’re better because they’re afraid of a little blood. Half of all smokers will die from smoking. Its deadlier than a coke or heroin habit, but then again most people don’t cut their blow with benzene and arsenic. I watched someone wither and die of cancer in less than a week. Waste your time exercising and eating well if you want, he was the most fit person I knew. Use your life before you lose it.

Sure being white & straight is great but being a suicidal, autistic drug addict isn’t such a great privilege. Losing my dad at 65 and now my cousin at 45, while my other cousin is in the ward for another suicide attempt is not a privilege. Unless you actually know a person (I mean really know) making judgment calls about their “privilege” is a privilege in and of itself, most of us are just trying to manage our own lives as its not my business to manage anyone else’s.

I was recently told to stop bitching & do something with my privilege.I spent the better part of a decade working in harm reduction & LGBTQ awareness (2005-2011). I did human rights articles for the school paper, wrote and edited for a magazine for at risk youth, drove a kid to his Hep C appointments cause I felt bad. When the funding stopped I made my own zine. Been the keynote speaker for a number of charity events, opinion writer on politics, drug policy, discrimination, literature & human rights. I work closely with a feminist icon who has been centre stage since ‘77 & makes Bikini Kill sound tame, yet still I get accused of “bitching” ‘cause I don’t want to be compared to the people that tried to rape my mother & did successfully rape more than five of my friends. Wold you like to be compared to Madam Mao simply because you were born with the same sex organs? Eva Braun? Countess Bathory? Bloody Mary? She loved to burn protestant families at the stake.

I saved people from jail & from overdoses but I should have used my privilege to support a cause more worthy. Not like any of that money went towards shelters for abused women, oh wait, it did. I went to college, took journalism, ethics, history, women’s literature, statistics (they are almost always incorrect & easy to manipulate) poetry, politics & a study of addictions. I published and edited three poetry collections, one from an ESL man from India, another from a mentally ill local poet & one from a former poly substance abuser. I lost money on all of these but Put in my own because I saw potential in them. Helped friends put together their own zines & chapbooks at 0 charge. I thought maybe I was doing something worthwhile with my life. Evidently I was just “using my privilege to bitch instead of for the greater good.” A phrase used to justify the means to the end. Ironically it was a common fascist slogan used to justify the murder of the infirm, insane & disabled. I was never told what this greater good was. Capitalism? Christianity? Upper middle-class white feminism? Sobriety? It certainly wasn’t the opioid crisis or autism awareness, not class drift or overmedication of youth. Structural functionalism maybe? A place for everything & everything in its right place. I think that mentally ill women need more of a voice in society than neurotypical & I did not charge her for editing or publication. I thought we could se more diversity so I took a chance on a book written by a man in India, judging by local sales people here are kind of racist. So what is this greater good? Good & evil are subjective ideas posing as absolutes. Good is a matter of perspective. Good is boring. I answer those that need me & do what I can. What is everyone else doing that surpasses me so much? I live below the poverty line with autism. I do

A friend of mine personally found 68 people dead in the government housing complex he works at. 6 years of schooling. Do you all carry and understand how to use naloxone? Its free so their should be no reason not to have it. When I was a junkie I had a few half-assed interventions but if I OD’ed no one could have done shit. Another good friend spends his time helping his 91 year-old grandpa & volunteers at a soup kitchen.

“All men are rapists.” “All Germans are Nazis.” “Women aren’t funny.” These are all ridiculous blanket statements that everyone knows are not true. Its too bad if you don’t like it but I’m a man and I don’t want to be compared to the piece of shit that sexually assaulted my friend when she was 5, whatever the hell your political agenda is. As anyone could tell you, some of the most notorious concentration camp guards were young women like Ilsa, ‘The Beast of Belsen”. Karla Homolka has a new family while somewhere in an evidence locker is a tape of her & Paul raping and murdering her teenage sister. Murder & rape are not sane acts to commit. You cannot teach a pedophile not to rape anymore than you could’ve taught John Wayne Gacy not to eat people. They’re both sick for life. No right minded individual would commit rape. It has been a capital crime for thousands of years, should be again. People tell their daughters to be careful because they know they can’t trust their sons. Unless you Clockwork Orange style condition it out of them somehow before they’ve tried it.

In a perfect world we’d teach our children not to rape and murder & they would listen. We don’t live in a perfect world, we live in a fucked up, sick one. The only person you should ever trust is yourself. You can be an idealist & try to end one of the oldest crimes in history through a vague education plan or a realist & know that if it comes down to a fight you have the advantage. I weigh just over 100lbs myself, I’d rather be prepared to defend myself if need be.

Oh & I do believe that rapists, potential or otherwise should be afraid. Not of being falsely accused & blowing their brains out before trial. I think that they should bring back capital for rapists, first degree murderers, child molesters, mass murderers & serial killers. Want to make them afraid? Send them to a special room with a sloped floor, put a bullet in the back of their skulls and let the bodies roll down into a heap for easy disposal & hosing off the blood. The Soviets were efficient executioners. Make their peers watch, but for fuck’s sake make damn sure they’re guilty before you pull the trigger.

The disunited infighting of the new left has alienated its best supporters. Black Panthers were more okay with white people than BLM, seeing as thy ran heroin and shot at the police instead of ended up cordoned off in the “protesters safe room” times are logged and registered, moles in place, police brought in to ensure than nothing happens to change the status quo. People with signs chant & feel better about themselves, rubber bullets and pepper spray manufacturers get rich and nothing changes. Almost 60 years since Kent State now. They’re making you feel like you’re making a difference but the laws stay the same or get tighter & it gives the cops a chance to beat on civilians, their favourite pastime other than shooting unarmed black kids. You need leverage to change things in politics, & memes are not leverage.

The alt-left is so my way or the highway (aka we never took rhetoric) that people who were on the left before it was trendy, the one’s who helped LGBTQ rights become mainstream and lost friends over it or got in fights to protect others feel marginalized now. We were a means to an end and now that we aren’t needed its “white fuckboy” or “ciscum.” We still go to punk shows and fight racists using our fists. Give change to the homeless  Act friendly & kind to strangers. Not out of any perceived obligation to a poorly defined greater good, but because we have empathy. We do what we can when and if we can. No more, no less.History is filled with examples of human beings doing good & terrible things. No race, culture or gender is immune or innocent to human flaws. Nelson Mandela was a hero to Black South Africans but his wife was notorious for ‘necklacing’ opponents to the ANC by shoving a tire over their body so their arms couldn’t move & then setting it alight where it would very slowly and painfully kill the victim by cooking them alive. They stayed married. Does that mean Nelson was evil? Thats up to you, the point is that oversimplifying complex situations will cause more harm than good, The last thing anyone wants is to start a cycle of blood vengeance. No two people are the same

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literature, politics, writing

The Fall of a Nation

In the process of making America “great” again the new administration is ripping it apart. No longer is it respected internationally. Mexico has been alienated, Canada disillusioned, Puerto Rico ravaged by hurricanes and then insulted by their own “president”. Afghanistan has dragged on for almost two decades, parents and their children find themselves together on the battlefield, some too young to even recall 9/11. It is not considered to have a free press and has violated countless human rights. Racism is more open and prevalent since it has been in the ’60s and mass shootings are a common occurrence. Immigrants are being expelled with nowhere to go while the jobs they did stay vacant. Many top government positions sit unfilled while education standards are plummeting. Student debt is so high that most people will be paying it off for the rest of their lives. Women’s rights are being abolished and the clock is turning backwards on civil rights.

After third wave feminism there came a backlash from single young white men, who felt that their place in society was being usurped by people of colour and women who they felt owed them sex just for being nice. In anger and frustration many of them turned to the far right via the internet, to nazism and white supremacy. Trying to disguise hate speech with the first amendment they became the alt-right who helped move that moron into the Whitehouse and marched under swastika banners in broad daylight. The suicide rate is going up and will soon surpass tobacco, cancer and heart disease as the number one killer, especially for young men. Millions of people are addicted to drugs, a large majority of them prescribed from the system itself. Meanwhile fentanyl is becoming the scourge of the drug world, 100 times more potent than morphine, 100 times easier to smuggle than heroin and much cheaper.

Twitter journalism has replaced real journalism and opinion is more important than facts. The lies are flying so fast no one cares to even keep track. Stadiums are filled with people paying hundreds of dollars to see a hologram of a dead musician perform while ignoring the beggars outside on the streets. It has become illegal in some places to even feed the homeless. They would rather see them dead than in their neighbourhoods. Security is up at airports and borders, where rights are routinely and thoroughly violated. The president is trying to take healthcare away from the poor and the dying, food from the elderly and disabled, money from the taxpayers to fund his lavish lifestyle and nepotism. Elections are being toyed with by the Russians and Putin is now the world’s most powerful man.

All America has is a massive foreign debt and army budget and a large arsenal of deteriorating atomic bombs and nuclear missiles. North Korea threatens the U.S. with destruction and they threaten to wipeout North Korea. Yet almost all of the president’s internal policies have failed, he is by all accounts a terrible and offensive diplomat who goes through staff members almost as fast as he does money. His staff go on TV and advertise his family’s businesses, the conflicts of interest are too many to count. He encourages police brutality and uses them to enforce his will on the people rather than protect them while building more for-profit prisons to house the most inmates in the world, the new gulag. He says America First, an old American nazi party slogan, then outsources jobs to China, which becomes more powerful with each passing day. It is shining with gentrification in some places, while others barely have infrastructure. Its been battered by floods and hurricanes. All this in less than a year.

In Canada we watch and wait, 30 million to 300. Our massive neighbour to the south has almost as much, if not more influence on Canada than our own parliament sometimes, and thats a sad fact. They are our largest trading partner. Thus the Prime Minister must tread carefully. The president goes against almost every Canadian value: multiculturalism, politeness, equality, legal weed and a preference for peace, his election has emboldened the racists and Neo nazis up here, and while they were hugely outnumbered by counter protesters they tried to have their own little Charlottesville, which was confined to an underground parking lot. Still your media prevails over ours on TV, the radio, the internet. We’re our own country but America is the apartment downstairs and the guy that just moved in is fucking nuts. He makes fun of cripples, is scared of blood but likes wars, is always saying racist bullshit and beating his wife and family but the sherif is on his payroll and he walks around with a loaded shotgun, pointing it at anyone who pisses him off. He hasn’t pointed it up, but we’re worried he might, or end up burning the whole house down while we’re all still in it.

America is not what it was. The foundation is cracked and the structure is faulty. Every country has repairs to make but America is starting to fall apart and if it collapses well, I live in the apartment upstairs.

Jack Blare, Monday October 9, 2017

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alternative, independent, literature, mortal, politics, Uncategorized, underground

Canadian Blood Services Would Rather Let You Die Than Receive Blood from Gay Donors

The link between HIV and homosexuality was thoroughly disproven in the ‘90s yet CBS will not let any man who has had sexual intercourse with another man within 1 year donate blood. HIV doesn’t leave the blood after one year and affects men women and children of any age or sexual orientation.

Would you rather die than get blood from a homosexual donor? CBS has taken that choice from you. There is no shortage of donors or blood, in fact CBS turns them away on a daily basis on unscientific and clearly homophobic grounds. There is more than enough blood to save everyone that needs it but CBS sticks to outdated and discriminatory policies. If anyone you know has died of blood loss its because CBS is vetoing over 5% of the population who could potentially donate. This homophobic and unscientific process has led to the deaths of thousands of innocent people in the guise of public safety. We need policy change NOW.

Enough lies about blood shortages when you won’t accept healthy donors. They would rather let people die and continue their pseudoscientific anti-gay policies. Test the blood. If it contains blood borne diseases then veto it. If not then it should go to save lives and those responsible for this policy should be fired and have their licenses to practice medicine revoked.

This is a follow up to an article I wrote while still in college seven years ago. CBS employees I spoke to promised change “in the near future.” There have been no policy changes in nearly a decade. This amounts to little more than judicial murder backed by doctors who seem to either be unable to understand how blood borne viruses work or have personal issues with gay people. In either situation they need to be replaced by doctors who are able to do their jobs without prejudice, which CBS has proven they cannot.

-Jack Blare

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addiction, alternative, depression, independent, literature, politics, Uncategorized, writing

Why fix it if it works?

Every time I think I have finally found a decent balance of medication one of my doctors has to fuck it up. Now I get to choose whether to withdraw from klonopin, which I’ve been taking as a prescription for four years, stopping suboxone and going through an opioid withdrawal or go back to shooting coke, dilaudid and fentanyl.With my anxiety at a peak, this being the year my dad died, my genius doctor is taking me off the medication that stops me from obsessively slicing holes in my body during panic attacks. I guess i could go on enough methadone to be too out of it to feel anxious. Really not caring much. Every time I try to do things the “right” way it somehow gets fucked up. Now the cravings have returned and all I want is double shot of hydro right in my mainline. I don’t trust anyone at all. 240 pages into my novel and I just stopped caring. I’ll write more when I get some speed. I’m so irritated at this point I would do practically anything. The only thing stopping me from going back to my poly-substance trash can ways is that B. is visiting. She’s the only person who’s opinion actually matters to me. If things go well maybe it will break this fog of misery. If not I’ll go west. I have places to stay and enough connections not to have to worry about anxiety or withdrawal. What most non users don’t understand is that we know its fucking awful for us, we know that a bad shot can kill, we’ve had cotton fever and we don’t care. When you live that sort of lifestyle its not a matter of if you die, so much as how and when. Everyone accepts it except the ones so tweaked they think they’ll live forever. The truth is that by the time you’re sticking needles in your flesh looking for a working vein and spending all your cash on your habit you don’t give a shit if the next shot puts you down. There is only the present and the present is junk. Some, like me, get out before that last one but every day more people drop like flies and nobody really cares. Whats another dead junky to this world?

Jack Blare

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alternative, independent, literature, politics, Uncategorized, writing

Why Tumblr Politics Are So Ineffective At Changing People’s Views

Every day your scroll down your dash reading post after post about Donald Trump, all of them negative. If there is a dissenting viewpoint its usually squashed with outrage. All you have to do is read the suggestions at the top to see that Tumblr is a very left-leaning website. These are good values to hold in my opinion but this platform has become an echo-chamber of liberal ideas and propaganda, what I mean to say is that we’re preaching to the choir. Just as 4chan is an exclusively right wing website Tumblr has become exclusively left wing. The result is that we are talking to each other and reassuring one another with the same ideas but not enacting the change we want because political posts on Tumblr will only,or mainly, be read by people who more or less share the same viewpoints.

Its important to have political discourse but if you want to really change people’s minds you have to get your message across to the opposition and the apolitical. So while Tumblr is a great blogging site its not the best place to voice your political opinion if you’re on the left precisely because there are so few right wing people actually using Tumblr.

Jack Blare

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